Spirituality

Get Good Enough Out of the Way; Make Room for Great

A concept that was mentioned in a book I am reading (Jack Canfield’s “The Success Principles”) was getting “good enough out of the way” in our lives.

What? Get rid of good? Yes – make room by getting good out of the way so you can have great! Sometimes good gets in the way of great.

That means if things in our lives are just good enough, that’s no good. They should be great! And it may mean saying “NO” to “just good enough”.

You can have a

good enough home
good enough relationship
good enough career
good enough body
good enough life
good enough car
good enough friends
good enough meal
good enough gift for someone
good enough recording or performance
etc.

…OR you can have a

GREAT home
GREAT relationship
GREAT career
GREAT body
GREAT life
GREAT car
GREAT friends
GREAT meal
GREAT gift for someone
GREAT recording or performance
etc.

And this may mean getting “good enough” OUT OF THE WAY to make room for “great”. Change is something we all resist – but this idea immediately spoke to me in terms of a career – and how my (dare I say our?) inner vision spills out into my world.

A musical career consists entirely of one’s vision and projection from the “inside” out – and I myself am working on upgrading the inside of myself – my vision!

The subway performer sees himself as worthy of playing the subway platform, the concert performer sees worthiness of the concert hall. All of our lives spills from within our consciousness outward into the allegedly “real” world.

I can’t tell you how many times I have come home from a restaurant or party gig – having made a few hundred bucks maybe, and seen a subway performer PERFORMING THE SAME TUNE BUT BEGGING FOR QUARTERS. I wonder – they see themselves doing that and being okay. I would not do that (I did a few times as a kid). We each took steps to create our reality that night.

On the same note – there may be people who played the same tune ON A FESTIVAL STAGE FOR THOUSANDS of people that night as well. Or on TV, at the top of the performance food chain.

Let’s assume that all the performers (subway – restaurant – festival) are equally talented and playing the same song; where does the difference lie? Clearly the concept of what one deserves, one’s worthiness on the inside emerges. It’s the same concept as dressing for the job you want – not the job you have. When you dress for the job you want, you see yourself in the new position already, and create it from the inside out…

The “vision” that lurks behind the day to day actions such as “what do I wear, who do I call, what do I spend time doing, what do I say yes to, what do I say no to, what do I spend money-time-energy on” all inevitably lead to making the “vision” behind the actions a tangible reality (if there even is such a thing).

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OH MY GOD! I CREATE MY REALITY!
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Part of my personal quest right now is to see myself and BE a world class, festival playing, touring performer. I am, and am currently in the process of playing the right places with greater frequency. For me – that’s the GREAT.

“Good enough” is the local gig scene, maybe a wedding here and there. I am NOT criticizing anyone who does the local stuff – what I am saying is that I am working on a new vision of GREAT for myself through visualizations and affirmations.

Why am I choosing this? Because the feeling of fulfillment and joy is greater when I can play at 100% full tilt, allowing my talents to shine. Playing background music is an experience that is merely good enough, not great.

Check this out…

This last weekend Jill and I went to a wedding in Hilton Head, SC and the band was rather good. I spoke to them and asked if I could sit in, and they said if I wanted to I could.

Then I sat back and realized – I was about to create the reality of my playing music at weddings all over again. There’s the poop – and I looked for it so I could step in it – like a poop seeking missile. It was the subconscious mind churning out images of what it knows, thereby spilling into my future….making my past alive in the now…and settling for “good enough” once again.

Deep down – my survival buttons, and a belief that I need to do that to survive – lurks.

“NO! I declare otherwise. I commit to a bright happy GREAT life doing what I love” I thought to myself.

When I saw this at play – I zoned into my picture of “GREAT”…touring, playing for open air festivals, creating, recording new tunes, making new friends, letting my talent and core genius shine – and took a stance to think to myself “I choose my reality of touring, festivals, videos and I am going first class all the way”.

I got “good enough” out of the way (by saying NO to playing with that band) to let GREAT in and retain my visualization.

Just think – the conversations with all the guests that would have followed, their perception of me, my relating to them as someone who just played for them, my connection to the band – would all be colored (from my vantage point) by my playing one song with a wedding band. A mental image would have been further imprinted for me.

An interactive reality and experience would have been created – and created more karma, more momentum, more memory and eventually more of a likelihood of it continuing the same way.

I repeat – there is nothing bad, wrong or negative about the band, weddings or playing at one; it is merely an acknowledgment and observation that I (can I say WE?) create our reality constantly through our choices and have to hold fast to creating a great life through having a great picture in our minds.

What’s not cool is this – allowing “good enough” to be, when “great” is there for the taking.

How can you get rid of “good enough” to make room for “GREAT” in your life?

Go for GREAT…you deserve it!

The Healing Powers of Music: Part 1

By Adam Rafferty 5 Comments

Greetings friends. This is what is bound to be a long series of articles, and a subject I find fascinating.

As of late I have been listening to (and watching on youtube) videos about the mix of quantum physics, personal development, spirituality and healing. At the forefront of this East meets West inquiry is Dr. Deepak Chopra. Many believe that he should marry Oprah Winfrey so that she could finally be Oprah Chopra. But seriously folks….

In an audio book type recording released by Dr. Chopra (not sure how I got it) the theme throughout was the connection of body and mind. It seemed like a promo piece for his book “Perfect Health”, but was not just an ad – it was information-packed.

He goes on to say that many of us are taught to think along the lines of Renee Descartes – one of the fathers of western philosophy. According to the audio, Descartes thought that body and mind were separate entities.

Chopra disagrees and gives scientific example of how the whole body – not just the head – thinks. He gives the example of the thought “I am thirsty” and how that same certain chemical that is released in the brain when the thought is had, is also released in the stomach, the heart and the kidneys as well. The thought “I am thirsty” is had by the whole body as an experience- and can be proven.

Here is a short video in which Chopra describes physiological effects of happiness and peak experiences:

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfBWtovxYQY&rel=1]

A basic point Chopra keeps coming back to is this: we have the greatest pharmacy in the world, right in our own bodies. Pharmacy and store bought medications are substitutes for what our body has the capability to naturally produce – only the chemicals that our body naturally produces are better for us and have no side effects.

So when ailments arise, it is often that the body is unable to produce it’s own “medicines” and patients turn to the same chemicals in the form of treatment.

Just like the water experiment – where the body / mind connection is demonstrated – he explains case study after case study in which patients learned to meditate, and their “in house” pharmacy suddenly started to be more effective.

Meditators came off or reduced medications / treatments for asthma, cancer, hypertension, chronic fatigue syndrome and more.

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OKAY ALREADY, SO WHAT DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH MUSIC?
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There is a very brief mention of the healing qualities in music, but when I heard it I perked up.

If a thought such as “I am thirsty” makes the whole body react (glands secreting fluids, etc) wouldn’t hearing a piece of music surely make the entire body – not just the head – react?

I know I have heard “scary music” in movies and reacted internally. I have heard music and cried at it’s utter beauty. I have danced to music and felt energized, overjoyed in a maximum health kind of way. I have been a rebellious teen and seethed with anger – and hard rock helped me feel like I was not alone in telling the world to go stick it :-). I have heard classical music and been lifted to the heights of (some of) the vision had my the great composers.

All of these experiences – we know now – are more than just “in the head”. They are full body, physiological experiences.

This must be one of the reasons that some music lasts over years while some dissapears the minute promotion dollars run out. When music lasts over the years it is because people really love it and get a special experience listening to it. It could be James Taylor, Stevie Wonder, J.S. Bach, James Brown or Howlin’ Wolf. There is a thread in great music that heals- and it is not limited to style. Music that stands the test of time has a very special ingredient.

This also explains why a mere “imitation” of something great is not necesarily great. The ingredient we are talking about is a “vibration” or wavelength that listeners pick up on – much like a ghost. Yet, we all know when we hear it – because we feel it. Something is happening in our bodies. Have you ever heard Aretha Franklin sing the blues and felt your skin tingle? I have – and I’d be willing to bet that it’s good for you!

This is the beginning of an explanation (to myself) as to why after years of playing jazz (I still do) and other types of music – I am finding something very special in my acoustic guitar and arrangements of simple songs. On the surface – yes, it’s simpler – but only in terms of vocabulary.

The sound, the vibration of the wood, the timbre of the bronze strings, and the simplicity of the melodies – is healing me. I can feel it!

Freedom From The Approval of Others: PERSONAL VICTORY!

By Adam Rafferty Leave a Comment

A very very interesting life experience went down just the other day and I feel compelled to share it with all of you.

My best friend asked me for some help moving a “room within a room” drum booth for soundproofing and home practice. Our appointment was set, a van was rented, arrangements were made.

Two days preceeding this big job, some family members blew into town and dinner arrangements were made for 6pm the same evening as the equipment move. The invited guests were NY based family (6 people, myself included) and the 2 out of town family members.

We started the move at 10am, figuring we’d be done in time.

Well, guess again…we arrived and were looking at a booth consisting of 15 200lb panels that had to be disassembled, loaded down a flight of stairs, into a van, out of the van, and into another apartment.

I could see at 2pm that I was in trouble. This task exploded into something infinitely bigger than we had anticipated. I called someone who would be there to let them know what was going on, and that I would do my best to be at dinner, but most likely be late.

My choices were, well – leave my best friend stranded with 2000lb of materials and possibly continue the job the next day (impossible because I had a gig that night and this was murder on my hands, and would be another day of $150 van rental) or explain to my family that I was very sorry about the situation and I’d meet them as soon as I could get there.

I figured that my family would say – “Hey, that’s his best friend. We’ll miss him here but he’s doing the right thing.”

Much to my temporary dismay, I became the black sheep. In their eyes, I was the one who dissed the family. I was talked badly about at the table before my arrival. In their eyes they were slighted, and they thought I put a little task and hanging out with a friend before “family”.

I arrived after dessert, to make good on my commitment in a situation that was truly out of my control, and walked into a room with double and triple scoops of dissaproval. I must say, I am dissapointed that “family” would actually delight in my feeling bad or guilty.

Here’s the beauty – the gem – the fruit of meditation and my contemplations. I know my self worth and know I am good. I know I did something out of love for a friend in need. And I know, without the shadow of a doubt that I can live without the approval of my family.

I say this not in a defiant, egotistical, adolescent way; I say it nobly, becasue I sat down at the table feeling good, feeling right – honestly! I looked at the elders and said to myself “it is ok if this person does not approve. I’m ok.”

And then for the 24 hours following, as I reviewed the situation I saw only one viable possibility for dealing with my family. I can sit and breathe in, breathe out and allow them to be who they are. And I can forgive 100% their shortcomings, and see that this event served to push everyone’s emotional buttons, and 8 different points of view regarding the situation churned in these 8 minds.

What they are failing to see is that I would do the same for them – and they might one day be very happy to have a guy with my integrity in their lives. Simply put, their egos got banged up a tad.

It’s as if all of a sudden all these psycho-spiritual things made sense to me. Forgive them. Pray for them. Love them. Even if they are disagreeing with my choices, dissaproving of me, criticizing me. I saw that this was the only intelligent alternative. Allow them to simply be.

I’m free. What used to plague me is losing it’s grip on me. The true SELF that I know watched in awareness of all this, even saw to a future time when all this would be forgotten, and in full intelligence and integrity I knew the right thing had gone down.

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The next day I recieved this text message from my best friend on my phone – “You’re a very good friend, Thank You Again”. He and I are always sarcastic and to receive a message this straight brought me to tears – because I know the person behind the message. This is a friend of 30 years who is family to me as well.

The reward is that I am free from the plague of needing their approval. Doesn’t mean I don’t love them, it just means I have my freedom.

Amen!

Practicing is Just Watching, That’s All

By Adam Rafferty 1 Comment

When I was a kid I loved to draw. I think I was probably into drawing and coloring before I was into music.

I noticed that I could just sit, pay attention and the drawing would draw itself. I know, this probably sounds as if I am telling you that I was a little Zen master – but I am being quite serious. There was not a notion of me doing it….honestly.

Over the last few years with my on and off relationship with web design, it has been the same…pay attention…make jillions of split second decisions and bang…creation has happened.

Lately I have been practicing the tune “Mas Que Nada” and it has also been the same – and so much fun. I will record this one for sure, and probably debut it on my gig in a few days.

I guess I am writing this to tell you what practice is and what it isn’t, at least for me.

It all started with a vision and then followed sort of like this, over the course of a few weeks:

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Wow this tune could be groovy!
I could imagine that people may want to sing along.
I want them to feel that easy Brazillian groove too, so they enjoy themselves.
Wouldn’t it be cool if I could get people dancing with just a guitar?
Hmm, what key might be good? E- will work, lots of open strings.
Let me listen to get the chords right. Ahh, it’s a little different than what I thought.
What’s the melody exactly?
The phrasing is kinda freaky – they are singing in Portugese!
I really want to get this tune so it is comfortable and I don’t have to think.
Wow, I need to separate my right hand fingers musically so the “a/ring” finger brings out the melody.
If I keep the bass rhythm consistent with my thumb, it makes this whole thing groove like a little machine.
That was what I needed to lock the groove in…cool!
I think I’ll play this until it feels really good.
Man, there is so much E-…a modulation would be nice…maybe I’ll do the 2nd verse in A-.
That sounds good, it breaks up the repetition.
After 2 times through I need a break of some sort…rhythmic, maybe use a loop pedal…hmm not sure.
Oh wow, a good ending would just be a really obvious “Ba Ba Ba!”
I’ll just practice this first in my routine every day for a week and make sure it feels good.

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So there it is. It just takes the patience to watch and wait. The world out there changes when we look at it, it’s not just a one way street of the solid world coming into our heads. “Out there” changes when “in here” changes. Pretty amazing. In fact, out there and in here are one thing, we just tend to split it in two!

The feeling of coming up with this arrangement was totally natural, not stiff. And it’s subject to change at anytime.

Now this arrangement can be anything in life, can’t it? A house, car, family, carreer, relationship…that’s what amazes me. Music is but a microcosm.

How much can I create just by envisioning & watching, and allowing things to come together – rather than forcing, being exasperated at results not showing up (which creates more of the feeling of no results) and all that.

Can I remove drama and let things be, and know that they will formulate? That’s the challenge. More to come….

The Butt Technique

By Adam Rafferty 2 Comments

Greetings friends! I am so happy….Fall finally feels like Fall here in NY.

I can’t say what an exciting time this is in my life….we truly do go through cycles. And I am actually very excited about how I am able to reach so any new fans & friends via onlie efforts (blog, youtube, etc).

I had an interesting conversation last night with a new friend “Ian” at my best friends birthday gathering…of course it was interesting to me becasue he is a new fan of my music 🙂 Seriously though, it brought up some interesting points that I’d like to share with you.

But first…..

As you know I am a fan of the Release Technique / Sedona Method and refer to it when I need to. (There are so many great personal developement aproaches out there, I find it hard to stick with one and exclude others).

You may never have heard of it – and I am not here to preach or sell anything. It’s all about letting go of limitations and allowing oneself to be, do or have anything.

I can give you an example. For years I thought it was wrong and unjazzlike to use effects pedals. Me, “Mr. Jazzboy” – with archtop endorsements, using pedals? How could I? Worse off – I imagined the double scoops of dissaproval I’d get from peers, jazz icons of yester-year, my teacher and how I’d be undoing the career I’d spent years paving.

Pretty dramatic, huh?

This may seem trivial – but at the time was my reality. (Take a second to appreciate that many of us do this all the time – maybe even you!) One day, (actually it took a lot of gumption) I got the effects out and started playing. People loved it and saw I was having fun. It just felt real,honest and fun – as if a tightness in my chest was let go.

The long and short of it was this – I dropped the limitation. Get it?

It involved “letting go” or “releasing” on the need for anyone’s approval. And, releasing on the “survival” aspect of my career.

Ironically, organist Dr. Lonnnie Smith loves what I do with the pedals. Who would have thought? Releasing actually led to one of the hippest gigs I’ve done.

I hate to use such a trite example, but can you see that our lives, our worlds are constructed out of these psychological houses of cards? It’s insane!!!!

Lester Levenson, the spiritual genius that taught many about this “letting go” concept, (Sedona & Release Technique) said that the highest level of achieving anything is “releasing” the limitations. I love this – he calls it the butt technique. Sit on your butt, release, and watch it come to you.

Whoa! Sounds good, but it is a little hard to believe!

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Back to the conversation I had at the party.

Ian, my bud, loved the new acoustic tracks and vids on you tube that I had put up and is also a Tommy Emmanuel fan (my new favorite guitarist, and the worlds fave as well).

He kept asking me “so you are here and Tommy is there. What are you going to do to get over there where he is?”

It sounded to me as if he was asking, “what will you do” or “what’s the plan” or “who will you call” to get from where I am to where I want to be.

I started to give an answer like, “well I hope I get there someday maybe people will check out the CD…” but he persisted, which I thank him for.

Finally I said to him “It’s not any one thing I need to do, as much as it is a place I need to be in my psyche and soul. When I am in that place, good things happen – people will like the music, doors will open unexpectedly.”

“And whether the doors open or not, the money and recognition comes or not – the being in that special place where the music lives, where I communicate to others, where I am free of hangups, – that is the place of spiritual success before outer success comes…that’s the place.”

“Oh and by the way – you can’t be in that place becasue you want the success. It is truly the zone of ‘the destination is the journey itself.'”

“So, if I want to be ‘there’ where he is – guess what – there is no ‘there’ where he is and ‘here’ where I am. The place to be is the zone of enjoyment and thanks, and then one is like a magnet puling in all good things.”

“I need do nothing except be in that place.” And then I realized – the butt technique was what I was describing.

And then Ian said “that was the answer I wanted to hear”.